VACATION
We will be leaving on vacation soon, to watch Q's little sister marry the man of her dreams. I'm excited and nervous.
This will be like our 2nd honeymoon,...... kinda. We are not taking the kids so that is why I say 2nd honeymoon. My parents and sisters will be watching them. I'm so blessed to have family close. I know that they will be in good hands and will have lots of fun on Papa's farm, and fishing in the back of the house. Lots of land to explore in the country. I'm sure they'll have farmer's tans and all.
I'm nervous because I have never been away from my kids for more than 3 days. It'll be 7 days for this trip. I have been constantly thinking about the fact that we will not see each other for a week. I know it's short but at times seems like an eternity. It makes me numb. I feel silly thinking on those certain days when life is tough and wanting nothing more than a vacation AWAY from my sweet little ones. Now that it's around the corner, I don't feel that way.
I just have to look at it as they are getting a vacation too. A week on the farm, in the country, with G &G and Aunties, right? I'm not worried, I just think I miss them already!!
Maybe it's because Gibson's had two rough days. Another allergic reaction to his shots, and tonight his body didn't agree with the merry go round and Q got the repracutions on his clothes!!! Maybe it's because Stella learned what a Uvala is from the book "Llama, Llama, Red Pajama," and now she is asking 20 questions about the human mouth. And I think she is just the cutest.
My question is....... If you have gone on a trip before w/o kids, did you do something special for them? I was thinking of wrapping up some $1 store presents for them to open up everyday. Or I've heard some write a letter. Any thoughts or ideas?
12 comments:
I have yet to leave my kids for a trip. I am scared to death to do so. Even when I had family close, it wasn't something I wanted to do. The longest we left Luke was when we had to come here for 3 days to look for a house. I'm starting to consider it, but I can understand the nervousness you feel. When we've watched other people's kids they have left them presents to open each day, left them special treats and called them whenever possible. Good luck and have fun.
Oh, I can see how it would be hard to leave them. I am sure I would be feeling the same way.
I think the little gifts would be cute idea.
It will be a great time for you and Q to reconnect and feel like newlyweds again!
I think presents are a good idea too. I think you should figure out the most difficult time that your children will have with you gone and plan for distractions--probably the morning.
I have never left mine...so I have no ideas for you, but the gifts would be fun for them I am sure. Whatever you do pass it on because I am sure eventually I will be away from mine.:)
Have fun!
I think your idea about wrapping a $1.00 present up is cute. It will give them something to look forward too. It's going to be hard to leave them as they do become your life! But I'm sure they will be fine and you'll get to just chill out.
Have fun and take lots of pictures. I love weddings.
Hugs.
Kim
I don't have kids but I remember my mom leaving for a week. I will list some of the mistakes I think that she made because I remember how it made it worse for me. She constantly told us how bad she felt that she was leaving, she didn't talk up my grandma's house like it was going to be super fun, and after that trip she never left us again until we were teenagers. The reason the last one was bad is it was good for us to learn how to be without her. When I was older she was gone for three weeks and I stayed behind with my sister to work. I learned the more in those three weeks then I did the rest of the time that I lived at home. The other thing is my parents should have went on a trip without us every couple of years so that they could remember why they married each other. Kids are great but put stress on a marriage. I think that I would have seen my parents express more love towards each other and us kids if they would have taken time for themselves as a couple. I have know idea how exactly it feels to leave your kids and some day I might eat my words. But don't feel guilty for leaving your kids. You need and they need it even if they have a hard time and have fun while your gone.
Don't be sad when they don't miss you. Family is awesome. When you do call, don't say, "Do you miss me?" Say, what did you do for fun and here is what I did. They'll love to see you again, and if you are strong they won't know it could possibly be a bad thing that you are gone. That is what I think, and have a good time.
I'm the lone dissenter here on the gift giving . . .
We left our kids for eleven days two years ago to go to Europe on our first real trip alone together since having kids. It was one of the best things we ever did for our marriage. Here are the advice tidbits I have for you:
You will miss your kids terribly for a day, maybe two, but then you'll begin to concentrate on having some really meaningful time with Q and that will bring you great joy, which seems to make missing the kids much easier.
Don't be offended if your kids have an amazing time with your family and don't moan and wail about missing you - be glad in the fact that they are well adjusted kids who are having their own adventure while you have yours.
Make a point to talk to the kids once every day, but like "the Kelly Variety" said, don't focus on the missing you part of being separated and don't call so much that they miss you more and their caregivers start to doubt your confidence in their ability to do a good job with your kids.
Now about the gifts - I don't love the idea of creating that kind of expectation in my kids that if we go away they'll get a present every day. Instead, we hid a note somewhere special in their room with a picture of us they could look at while we were gone and made them each a little book where they could check off things they needed to do while each day while we were away (like say prayers, brush teeth, help grandma). We told them that if they did all the things in the book we would bring them back a surprise from our trip. Worked like magic!
Last (sorry this is SOOOO long) when you come home, you will realize two things: how much you love and adore your kids, and how it will be even easier the next time to take a vacation with just your hubby. :)
Good luck and have a fantastic trip!
We have had to leave our 4 year old for more than a day or two twice, once at 9 months and once just before she turned 3. Let me tell you, I know EXACTLY how you feel. I had a knot in my stomach for months before we even left every time I thought about it. I cried buckets right after we said good-bye (and I'm really not a cryer (sp?)). Had my hubby not forced me to leave, I probably wouldn't have gone. I will also say, though, that I think it's much worse on us than them. Obviously, try to be strong and just tell them how much fun they are going to have and that you love them and will see them soon. The time away was well worth it. Once I was gone, it didn't take too long to get over the terrible feeling I had when I left. I think my husband missed her more than I at times. I called a couple of times and she was absolutely fine, of course. The time she was older, she had just a few sad times before bed when she was exhausted from all the fun things she did all day (my parents didn't tell me that while I was gone, thank God), but then she woke up happy again in the morning. We all had a great time, and we were very excited to see eachother when the trip was over! In 3 weeks we have to leave both of the girls for 6 days to go on a mission trip, it's the first time I'm leaving my 9 month old for more than one night. I'm already dreading it, although I know it will all be fine. Hang in there, the anticipation is the worst part of it!
I am sure it's difficult for you to leave them. But I bet they will be having a great time on your parent's farm. I hope you will be able to relax and have a great time!
I haven't left them for too long yet. Good for you for doing it, Kasey. I think you will come back a better mommy, for sure.
Now I can't talk to you anymore because I'm jealous. ;-)
Kasey, I understand your sense of nervousness! We haven't even spent more than a night away from our kids . . . so you're a step ahead of us, with 3 nights away! :o) At least you're reassured that they will be in good hands!
The little gifts are a cute idea, but what would they do with it? I think it's just reassurance for us, that we did something for them while we're away. I'm sure a phone call (or two) a day would be great for them . . . and of course bring something home for them!
I used to love it when my Dad went on business trips and brought us something home, it felt that he thought about us while he was gone.
I hope you both have a wonderful time!! ;o)
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